The commish, Rick Messina, throws righty bats righty. Can be dominating as a pitcher when he's on. His bat is erratic but just when you think you have him pegged he'll hit one out on you. Looks better in long pants. Likes to wear muscle shirts to show off his arms. Plays with a very expensive watch. Makes the final call on all controversial arguments.
John Borchures, throws lefty (slowly) bats righty. Is trying to look intimidating in this picture but is the opposite. Bad ankles. Has a hard time walking without wincing. Strengths: patient at the plate. Is kind to animals. Will never pass up a free meal. Very approachable. Harmless. Weaknesses: would rather walk than hit. Likes to give up home runs. Chides opposing players. Bad ankles
John Manfrellotti, throws righty bats from either side of the plate. Still wants to be on the New York Mets. Fancies himself as the best player in the league. Trys to distract opposing players by dancing on the field. Will do anything to win. Can be very funny. Sometimes he is so cool he"s geeky. Loves to exploit others weaknesses. (on and off the field). Is fun to be around when he wins. Pouts when he loses.
John Caponera, throws righty bats righty ( unless it's a weak game will bat lefty). Always thought he could be a major leaguer. Would have made it if it wasn't for the fact that he couldnt't hit, throw or run fast. Life evolves around playing wiffle ball on Sundays. How pathetic. Would have given his left arm to play in the majors but then he would have been a pretty bad fielder.
Marty Rackham, throws righty bats from either side of the plate. Works around the house all week so wife will let him play on Sundays. Brings good chicken wings. Former pro soccer player who has resorted to playing wiffle ball with a bunch of other has beens. Strengths: Can pitch and hit. Always changes scoreboard. Doesn't hold grudges. Weaknesses: someetimes forgets to brush his teeth before retiring. Takes pictures in bad lighting. Will fall for change up.
Pete Schwaba, throws righty bats righty. Trys to keep a low profile. Doesn't make waves. Likes to disobey the no pepper sign. Strengths: Good A player. never gets too excited. Laughs on cue. Never over indulges. Weaknesses: never gets too excited. Can only play when his wife lets him. Has to live with his last name.
Billy Owens, throws righty bats both ways. Played in Strawberry Field's first out of town game as part of visiting team. Has unlimited pass to the park. Brings in good competition. Strengths: variety of pitches. Great baseball name. Good stick. Weaknesses: never throws the same pitch twice. Can't handle his liquor. Is hittable in later games. Loves the Cubs..
Chad Anderson, throws lefty, bats lefty. Argueably the best player in wiffle ball. Throws several pitches effectively. Wicked screwball. Hits for average and power. Hopes one day wiffle ball will become a professional sport so he could be the first draft pick and quit his job at Pizza Hut. Weaknesses: Is the whitest player in the league. Runs wiffleball tournements and puts his name on the MVP trophy before it starts.
Construction Bill, Throws righty bats righty. Worked his way up to an A player with an impressive screw ball. Good stick. Likes to pop a few beers. Better in the early games. Does great work for Rick. Likes the asprin. His truck is always in the way. His daughters are better than some of the guys in the league.
Jackson Purdue, throws righty bats righty. Good stick. Homer or strickout. Hates to walk. Pitching is erratic after losing screwball. Has control problems. Weaknesses: likes the Padres and the Chargers
Jeremy "Pappy" Kramer, bats righty, throws righty. The toughest cat in the league as you can tell by the picture. Look at those arms. He is a mean mofo. Once killed a man just for snoring. Strengths: doesn't allow walks. Calls the game as he plays the game. Will still play with rash or jock itch. Won't swing at a bad pitch. Weaknesses: His patience at the plate drives everyone nuts. Throws like it's slow pitch softball.
Jeff Hatz, throws righty bats righty. Worked his way up from triple A to be a good A ball player. Keeps a low profile. So low that after two years people still don't know who he is. Looks like he should be doing your taxes. Strengths: good stick and fielder. Decent control. Weaknesses: needs more pitches. is hittable in A games.
Riley Barber, throws righty bats righty. Won't bat unless the plate is neat. Is just happy to be playing as you can tell by the picture. Misses Houston's humidity. Strengths: has descent control. Good eye. Weaknesses: Only has one pitch , slow down the middle.
Bruce Baum, throw righty bats righty. Very underrated. Strengths: excellent fielder for chubby man. Great eye. Good stick in either A or B game. Good control on the mound. Tells chicks in bars that he's David Crosby. Weaknesses: no variety of pitches. Food. Pot.
Coach Kip Adotta, excellent cook who knows how to tell a joke. Strengths: Shrimp scampi, Halibut. Doesn't need sun screen. Makes everyone feel better that they are not the oldest one around. Weaknesses: cigar breath. uneven tan.
Monty Hoffman, Throws righty bats Righty I think. Seldom plays. Jack of all trades. Excellent cook. Stadium grounds keeper. Beer man. Pool cleaner. Food shopper. Will move your car for a small fee. Weaknesses: Sleeps alot. Likes to say "While you're up get me a beer". Likes to bet with no money.
Dave Hawthorn, Strawberry Field's number one fan. Never missed a game. Season ticket holder. Strengths: can run with a joke. Enjoys himself drunk or sober. Gets along with everyone. Weaknesses: doesn't have a life outside of Rick's. Doesn't know how to act when Lenny is not around. Can't finish a sentence without Lenny.
Terry Mulroy, throws righty bats righty. Can only play night games. Excellent sense of humor. Sometimes brings shrimp. Weaknesses: Doesn't like to move fast. Bad posture. Can only play night games.
